Time

Don't you think this year has just passed by so fast? I mean, it is the end of June already, and we're gonna be on the second half of this year. I feel like 5 months ago I had just come back from Bali, 4 months ago I was doing the Drama test, 3 months ago I faced my very last day learning at School, 2 months ago I was doing the English competition at UI, last month I just graduated from St. Aloysius, and here I am today writing this blog.

At some point I feel that I need to turn back time, go back to someplace in the past and change what I regret today. I could've won that national competition at Universitas Indonesia in April, but I lost. Well let's just not say "I lost the competition", it was more "I was giving chances to a school from Makassar, because they had come there using airplane, which means they had spent more money than I did.". Okay, I lost the competition. But that's not the point, losing doesn't mean you're actually defeated. it means that if you win maybe something bad will happen. You will, maybe, underestimate other teams, underestimate the other competition if you attend it. That's not good right? Underestimating things like that is bad.

Some of my friends told me: "It feels like it's only yesterday I was doing the orientation program of SHS." Well that's a total lie let me tell you that, it's just a statement when you gotta say goodbye. I mean, you do feel the 3 years of waiting for this graduation day. You did the finals and all the tests and thesis and revisions, how come you did not feel those things? The same case as when a child has to go to college and leaving their parents. Parents, especially a mother, will say this: "It feels like it is only yesterday I gave birth to you, I sang you to sleep, and I hold your hand towards your class on that very first day of school.". Believe me, it does not feel like yesterday, it's just a statement that's gonna make you feel bad for leaving home while we all know it is what your parents want you to do. 

People nowadays are less aware of time. We keep on rushing on everything we do, we have targets and deadlines. Those busy stuffs makes us forget how to enjoy every moment that time has given us. You can't turn back to that one second before you finally say to your girlfriend: "Baby I think it's over for us both.". It only takes less than 10 seconds to say that but it has a huge impact in the future, and if you want to unsay it, you can't, we don't have that "ctrl+z" in our life. Well even if we did, it would be such a terrible thing. People will say anything they want and then undo it afterwards. We're lucky we don't have that in our life, so we can learn to think before saying a thing.

We need to enjoy the moment we have, even if it is hard. I know how that feels, 3 months ago I was busy as hell. I had to learn for Pre Exams and doing tasks at the same time, I had deadlines to catch. But I told myself: "Enjoy this all! There are a lot of people out there who want to feel this busyness. They don''t have school or even money to make them able to get an education. Be thankful even it feels like hell. You're gonna miss this 6 months from now." And it is, I miss those moments now. I currently don't have anything to do to be honest. So, what I'm trying to tell you is, you don't have any reason not to be thankful of the moment you have today. You don't know why you're given that moment. It's always something good behind it. Enjoy the time, you can't turn back to one second ago, this is life not a youtube video.